Friday, June 25, 2010

Suit Up! with Susan Sarandon

In kindergarten I was obsessed with having crutches. Now, I'm obsessed with having a sparkly cactus suit.

Susan Sarandon at the premiere of 'Great Directors' at MOMA held Tuesday, June 22, 2010.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

TIGER BEAT PRESENTS: Everyone I was in love with at age 9.

Devon Sawa
Remember him from: Little Giants, Casper, Now and Then, Wild America, Final Destination
Don't forget about: Idle Hands

Final Destination was made TEN YEARS AGO. The franchise, much like the featured characters, just won't die. Anyway, here's what Devon Sawa looks like now.

I get Devon Sawa confused with...

Brad Renfro
Remember him from: The Client, The Cure, Tom and Huck, Apt Pupil
Don't forget about: Ghost World

While looking up these heartthrobs, I learned that Brad Renfro died two years ago from a heroin overdose at the young age of 25. Really flipping sad.

I get Brad Renfro confused with...

Ethan Hawke
He was in: Dead Poets' Society, Reality Bites, Gattaca
You know him. He's still around. I just tend to mix him up with Brad Renfro.

Guess what? He directed the music video for Lisa Loeb's Stay (I Missed You). Yes, really. This required direction...

Jonathan Taylor Thomas
He was in: Wild America with Devon Sawa, Tom and Huck with Brad Renfro, and he was the voice of Simba in The Lion King.
Don't forget: Man of the House, in which he played Farrah Fawcett son's and Chevy Chase's soon-to-be stepson AND that Christmas movie he made with Jessica Biel.

Plus, he starred in Home Improvement AND guest starred on Veronica Mars as did Zachery Ty Bryan. No word on what younger brother Mark's up to, but I sure hope he grew out of that goth phase.

For more teen dreamboats, see...the entire cast of White Squall.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

I believe this was after he parachuted into a tomato truck.

I heard that John Stamos will be joining the cast of Glee next season (as Emma's dentist boyfriend), and my first thought was, "Can John Stamos even sing???"


Tuesday, June 1, 2010

I don't want to buy anything, sell anything, or process anything as a career.

How to Create a Commercial in Six Easy Steps:

Step 1 - Film various scenes of people having fun. Be sure to include people of all races, ages, and possible relationships (so as not to alienate any valuable markets). Necessary scenes include people dancing, jumping, laughing, hanging with a pet, jumping, kissing or hugging, and hanging out on a bed (probably jumping). Mix up these scenes, and throw them all together.

Step 2 - Add EITHER a quirky indie pop song OR a get-up-and-dance funk classic.

Step 3 - Add inspiring, yet utterly unoriginal text to reinforce your commercial's message. If you can't fit the text in periodically, combine all the inspiration into one MEGA-INSPIRED line at the end of your commercial.

Step 4 - Infuse your ad with a "Be yourself, be happy, have the good old times all the time, and don't forget to seize the day," message.

Step 5 - Hide the more sinister message of "You cannot be an individual with joy in your heart without purchasing the same things that 50 million other unhappy people are buying," underneath your first message.

Step 6 - Repeat. Over and over and over again.

(Add your flavor)

Oh, and Target is the holy queen of this:
(Long live happy)

Stay you:

Today's the day:

There's an M in everyone:

Create your beautiful for less (with extra skin care):

What's wrong with casual Monday? (with extra dancing):

See what you love:

Find your place in the rhythm of life (with extra wind):

Go forth (with extra Walt Whitman):