I'm quite sure this is somehow poor public transportation etiquette, but I just can't help myself. And the fact that everyone and their half-sister is walking around with one of those jumbo-tron iPod touch or iPhone screens these days isn't helping matters any. My guilt over this invasion of privacy is only compounded by the fact that I personally always try and shield my screen from anyone's view, seeing as how I'd rather not have the world-at-large knowing just how often I'm listening to Legally Blonde: The Musical**.
So I'm on the bus yesterday, and as I sit down I happen to notice that the guy sitting next to me is listening to "You Oughta Know," by Alanis Morissette (obviously). "Hmm," I think to myself. "This guy seems like a winner." BUT THEN, I glance over a few minutes later, and the guy has switched to the soundtrack for The Drowsy Chaperone. Now, The Drowsy Chaperone is one of those Broadway musicals that is one huge tongue-in-cheek reference to other Broadway musicals, written, I'm assuming, solely as a love letter to Broadway musicals and those who love them. Which means, seeing as how I am now sitting next to someone who apparently enjoys both angsty-era Alanis AND showtunes, my "This guy seems like a winner" has immediately morphed into "I need to make this guy my new best friend."
I kept scrolling through my screen, hoping he'd notice I was listening to The Last Five Years soundtrack and immediately request my hand in best friend-dom. He didn't. He perhaps thought I had muscle spasms in my scrolling thumb; perhaps I'll never know. OR PERHAPS I WILL. Because I've decided to turn this post into my own personal version of the Reader's "Missed Connections" page.
Alanis and Hammerstein guy, if you're out there, please put one hand in your pocket and type a comment with the other. We should probably be BFF's. I have the Lincoln Center version of The Light in the Piazza on VHS (taped off of WTTW holla), and I once had a chat with Meg Cabot in a Border's about Under Rug Swept.
*January is National Stalking Awareness Month; stalking is not a joke.
**Upon further thought, I rescind this statement. I love this soundtrack, and I don't care who knows it. It's smart, clever, female-empowering and will go down in history as the best musical adaptation of a Reese Witherspoon questionable career choice. On a similar note, I will be first in line for tickets to see Red, White and Blonde: On Ice.
I'm an avid iStalker and unfortunately feel for the most part that people are hiding their screens from me. Except for one beautiful instance:
ReplyDeleteOne day I was commuting next to a particularly stone-faced, square-jawed, slick-black-hair day-trader kinda guy with an expensive suit and a third generation iPod. 'What is the key to this man's epic success trading pork futures, day after day?' I rightfully wondered.
I lifted my head over his seat as he browsed his library and came to his pleasing end, reclining his head on the metal bar and into aural bliss. There was no artist or album name where they should be tagged, just a lone, simple track tag: "YANNI."
"I don't fucking care which song it is. Just get me some fuckin' YANNI. RIGHT FUCKING N--ohhhhhhhhh yeah, that's the stuff. Mmmhmm."