Monday, August 31, 2009

I'm gonna live forever, I'm gonna learn how to fly, HIGH.

Although the title suggests otherwise, this post is not about Fame.  It is about Heroes, the reason for my recent loss of interest of everything else in life.  I didn't follow Heroes when the first three seasons aired, but now I can't stop watching.  And my question is, given that Heroes is really nothing new, why is it so addictive?

In theory, Heroes should not be popular.  We are at the tail end of the superhero revival, having exhausted many of the old classics, of course infusing them with dazzlingly attractive celebrities and countless explosions.  And the group superpower concept has been done, most recently in the X-Men trilogy and even in The 4400.  

Perhaps it is because Heroes very carefully straddles the line between full blown comic book fantasy (X-Men) and a this-could-happen-to-you situation (The 4400).  Or maybe it provides viewers with an outlet for their fears of nuclear war, with everyday citizens to saving the world.  Maybe it's because there are simply so many characters and storylines that even someone who has watched the first two seasons in five days can't keep track of them all.  

But I think I'll go with explanation number four: we don't know who the bad guys are.  We have a pretty good grasp at who the good guys are, Claire, Hiro, Peter.  But even future versions of themselves are pushed to such extremes that their actions slide into a morally questionable area.  So, who are the bad guys?  Mr. Bennet?  The company?  Even Sylar puts on such a good show sometimes that we can really believe he's changed.  After all, his conversion into a sociopathic murderer becomes understandable if not condonable after seeing his past.  Basically, this show is not High Noon.  There is no sheriff and no outlaws, and the only thing more slippery than the morality of the characters is the future itself.  

Of course, there's always the possibility that high Heroes viewership is a direct result of some sort of government conspiracy to keep track of all of us.  In other words, the only bad guy here is the Nielsen ratings.

Season 4 begins with two-hour premiere on Monday, September 21 at 8/7c.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

There's bloatED, there's bloatING, but no BLOATY.

True story: yesterday I went to my local library and checked out Insomniatic, the third album released by pop duo Aly and AJ.  To my constant relief, Blogger has a spellcheck feature, and "insomniatic" has a big red line under it because, you know, it's NOT A FREAKING WORD.  Insomnia, insomniac, yes.  Insomniatic, no.  But Aly and AJ beg to differ...and offer an explanation.  The following is taken from their CD jacket, verbatim.


in⋅som⋅ne⋅a⋅tik / in-′säm-nE-&-tic / adj. [L, fr. insomnis sleepless, fr. in- + somnus sleep —more at SOMNOLENT] (ca. 2007)

1: the state of mind where one becomes addicted to the deprivation of sleep caused by an epic revelation of joy
What makes this ridiculousness simply heartbreaking is Aly's listed income on MySpace.

Oh, and by the way, they just changed their name to 78violet.  No reason, just felt like it.  In related news, my brain just exploded.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Obligatory Octomom Post

It's true.  I watched Octomom: the Incredible Unseen Footage last night.  Now, I'm not going to bore you with more information on how this woman runs her household, opinions on her past choices, or criticisms of relationship with the media.  All I'd like to point out is the manner in which this special was taped.  Having fourteen children is beyond scary, and apparently, the people who made this special wanted to make that crystal clear.

Party in the city where the heat is on...

So, Khloe and Kourtney Kardashian have officially taken Miami, and I must say, I wasn't blown away by the episode I saw.  Unlike Keeping Up with the Kardashians, their new show has no Kendall, no Kylie, no brutal mocking and life-ruining of Kris or Robert, and no eye-rolling from Bruce Jenner.  It was mostly just Kim and Khloe bitching at each other.  Uh, no thanks.

The show did have its entertaining moments, though.  For instance, Khloe has a new radio show with a super-cool co-host.  After their first show, they get drunk and make out, and then she brings it up on air during their next show.

Now, in recent news, we've learned that Kourt's got a bun in her G.E. trivection oven*.  So, I think my best bet is to start watching this show during the second season (that we all know it will get picked up for), in which there's a good chance of hearing things like, "You've got a baby!  In a bar..."

A note on the picture above:  I have never seen anything so Photoshopped in my whole life, and I regularly Photoshop myself into pictures of Robert Pattinson.  Does the reflection in the boat window even make any sense?

* This baby was created through a combination of Kourtney's eggs, the heat of Miami, and the third heat (which will allow the baby to mature five times faster than conventional babies): her mother's intense desire to have anything that will fit into little kid clothes (except a monkey).

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Clips of the Day

Okay, so I know that technically I already posted a music video of this song, but that one didn't have Joseph Gordon Levitt.  

What's that?  One clip about bank robberies just isn't enough for you?  Fine, you greedy blog-reader, you can have this one too, but there's no dancing in this one.

P.S.  Amy Poehler, Team Edward?  To be discussed at a later date.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

With a cameo by...Regina Phalange.

The movie Bandslam is out in the theaters tomorrow, and, while I know it's not worth spending the $8, I must consider whether or not it is Netflix-worthy.

  • Lisa Kudrow's in it.  And Ryan Donowho.  DonoWHO, you ask?  Johnny from The O.C.  You know, the one who got drunk and fell off a cliff.  No, not Abby.  That was Dawson's Creek, and a pier, not a cliff.
  • (NOTE:  The following 'pro' will be an examination of the social interactions of Disney stars.  If that does not interest you, please move on.)  Okay, so in my mind Vanessa Hudgens and Aly Michalka don't get along at all in real life.  This is because Hudgens is a bad girl (nude pics, gettin' all up on Z'efron) and Michalka, along with her sister, is a total, well, hmm.  Here's a quote, and you can decide for yourself. (
Do you believe in evolution?
“No,” AJ says, shaking her head and frowning.
“Wait,” Aly says, bolting forward. “Are they teaching that in schools now?”
They’ve been teaching it for the better part of a century.
“I think that’s kind of disrespectful,” Aly says. “Anything that has to do with anybody’s beliefs on religion, that should stay out of the classroom. I mean, I think people should be able to pray in school, if people were into that. Everybody should just do their own gig.”
“Evolution is silly,” AJ adds. “Monkeys? Um, no.”
So, I just think that maybe they're not the best of friends, and pondering this fills my life with joy.

  • It appears to be a sub-par, Jack Black-less version of School of Rock.  The main character's description on the film's website is, "the new kid in town, Will knows more about music than...anyone.  He assembles a band to compete at the biggest event of the year, a battle of the bands."  That sounds like creating musical fusion to me.  Oh yeah, and there's a girl who plays the cello.  "Tip it to the side, and CELLO, you got a bass."
  • Samantha Hudgens plays a character named Sa5m.  The 5 is silent.  Samantha Hudgens plays a character named Sa5m.  The 5 is silent.  I thought it might be helpful to read that twice.  Let it sink in.
Alas, it's a tie.  Perhaps Netflix will save me the trouble of deciding and will make it one of the movies I can watch instantly.  I leave you with this...

Monday, August 10, 2009


A couple of posts ago, I expressed my non-excitement for the star-stuffed and boringly titled film Valentine's Day.  Then yesterday, I watched the trailer for New York, I Love You.  From the producer of Paris, Je T'aime, it uses a similar format (a bunch of unrelated short stories with different directors all in the same city).  And while it probably has MORE stars than Valentine's Day and does not appear to contain a vampire plot line (pre-annoying, sparkly vamps) like PT does, I think I already like it more.  Probably because, if it's anything like PJT, it covers a wide range of relationships and ultimately is about the relationship between the city and the people.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Pretty Much Sophie's Choice.

As you may or may not know, Taylor Swift, Miley Cyrus, and Avril Lavigne each have their own clothing lines now.  The clothes reflect each of the young women's distinct, unique personalities.  In fact, they're so different, I thought you might need a little help navigating which is best for you. 

Now, it's very important that you decide which you value more before you rush out to Walmart: true love (Taylor Swift) or love, faith, and hope (Miley Cyrus).  Keep in mind that Taylor's idea of true love may include a double suicide, Shakespeare style.  If you still can't decide, try to factor in your feelings about butterflies and doves.

I know, I know, you were disappointed when the whole girls-wearing-ties trend went out with all of Avril Lavigne's hits that had numbers in the titles.  Well, the trend is back, and it brought zebra print with it.  If you can't decide between these two, y'know, because they're sooo different, consider the fact that Avril's (right) costs four times as much as Miley's (left).

I don't know about you, but I can barely get through the day without thinking, "My pants just aren't bright enough!"  Well, my problems have been solved.  Taylor offers a lovely peach option, great for work, brunch, and the circus.  Avril, on the other hand, has delivered a hot pink option, perfect for the club, drinks with the girls, and Halloween.  (In the interest of full disclosure, I actually REALLY like the peach pants.)

Now, it's very important that you make the right decision between these two (left, Miley; right, Avril).  It all depends on whether you're a summer or a winter and whether you're a two-button person or a four-button person.  It is crucial that you make the right decision.  I personally will only purchase either of these if they turn out to be culottes.

Alright, I wish you the best of luck making these difficult decisions.  Miley and Taylor's are at Walmart, and Avril's is at Kohl's (and is considerably more expensive).  And I'll be at home, wishing I had enough cash for those peach pants.

Sunday, August 2, 2009

True Life: I Miss You, Gideon Yago

During the 2000 presidential election, Gideon Yago began working for MTV.  During the following five years, Ex-Roommate and I grew to love him.  He often appeared in MTV News' interruptions of the regularly scheduled programming (aka I Love the insert appropriate decade here), and he worked on documentaries and specials on health, world events, and politics.  He's interviewed some pretty rawsome people, and his writing's been featured in some top magazines.  OH, AND HE'S THE NARRATOR FOR TRUE LIFE.

So, now we must ask, where are you, Gideon Yago?

Well, he's hosting the second season of the IFC Media Project (Independent Film Channel,, which is a "hard-hitting examination of how the news gets made and how it impacts our daily lives."  Plus, he wrote a script called Underdog which has been acquired by Focus Features.  So, keep an eye out for Gideon Yago cause I've got a hunch we'll be seeing a lot more of him...

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Clip of the Day

I am officially sending Disney Channel a letter begging them to show old Disney Channel Original Movies on Friday and Saturday nights after 10 P.M.  So great.

Romeo, Take Me Somewhere We Can Be Alone

I cannot express the pure ecstasy and excitement I felt upon seeing this photo for the first time.

Yes, it's true.  Taylor Swift and Taylor Lautner will be part of the romantic comedy Valentine's Day which will be released during Valentine's Day weekend of next year (of course).  I simply adore the fact that they're wearing crowns in this picture, and that pictures have been released of them in gym class uniforms, and the fact that their names, being the same, can't be merged into a corny couple hybrid.  However, I am not excited for this movie.

Why?  Because it stars every romcom celebrity known to humanity (Bradley Cooper, Jessica Biel, Anne Hathaway, Jessica Alba, Julia Roberts, Ashton Kutcher, Jennifer Garner, Patrick Dempsey, Topher Grace, Jamie Foxx, and Queen Latifah), and I'm sure it includes every romcom cliche as well.  While I'll most likely end up going to the theatre to see this movie just for the Taylors Swift and Lautner, I'll stay because of my undying hope to see the reprisal of the romantic tension between Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Garner, first seen in Alias.  

Also, Taylor Swift, I love that you never wear anything but boots.  Even when it's hot out.