Friday, April 3, 2009

My Brother Stole My Brain Space

Most people blame their quirks and odd habits on their parents and how they were raised, and although I only know how to spell antidisestablishmentarianism because of dear old mom and dad, a good deal of my weirdness is a direct result of growing up with my younger brother, Joe. (The rest of my personality was clearly established through the WB.) My two older sisters are 15 months apart in age, so Joe and I spent a great deal of time together over the years.

When Joe and I weren't building forts and sumo wrestling (with bean bags strapped to our chests), we were watching tv. A lot of tv. My middle child mind only remembers watching what Joe wanted to watch- Cartoon Network. And for this reason I will be perpetually maladjusted.

I have watched more Scooby Doo episodes than the Harlem Globe Trotters combined. This may be the reason why I cannot pass a portrait without thinking that a criminal is watching me through the eyes of the painting. Same goes for suits of armor, though I don't pass suits of armor frequently. Note to self: make fun of Joe more for having a creepy 8-year-old Don Knotts obsession.

I know that Charmander turns into Charmeleon which becomes Charizard. I know his card is worth 120 points among many other things that will not get me a job. My personal favorite was Ninetails, and I still lose sleep over the fact that Meowth could talk, but none of the other Pokemon could.

I recently watched a clip for a new movie called Dragonball Evolution and understood it.

When I hear songs from the Barber of Seville, I think of the Bugs Bunny cartoon, not the opera.

I have several songs on my computer by Brak from Space Ghost Coast to Coast, and I know the words to all of them. I think Soup On A Stick is actually pretty romantic.

When I hear "Qu'est ce que c'est?" I think of the alien duck guy from Courage the Cowardly Dog. This especially sucks as I have a French minor.

Sometimes I seriously miss Dastardly and Muttley.

The other day I tried to explain Snorks to four different people. No one understood what I was talking about until I texted my brother, and he was like, of course I know what Snorks are.

For a long time, I thought Rodney Dangerfield stole, "No respect!" from Jabberjaw.

These are the things I am thinking about when you ask me about current events and homework assignments. So just give me an extra second to finish up pondering Two Stupid Dogs, and then we can talk about Obama.

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